Friday, November 21, 2008

Somebody set up us the bomb

I have been issued, at my workstation, the "Bomb Threat Checklist" pictured at left, to be deployed in the unlikely event that someone calls me with a bomb threat.

In such an instance, I am to use the checklist to gather pertinent info from the would-be bomber. Some of the stuff is pretty basic, and I could have thought of it myself, like "Where is the bomb now?," "When is the bomb going to explode?," and "What does the bomb look like?"

I am also to note the bomber's "demeanor," whether it be "calm, excited, angry, incoherent," etc.

BUT my favorite part of the whole checklist are these two questions:

"What is your full name and address?" and "What is your call back number?"

"Oh, it's Jackson S. Blowshitup, and my number is 415-282.....hey, wait a minute!!!"

Happy Friday, everyone!

Tomorrow Super Hot Irish Girlfriend and I will cram ourselves into very small airplane seats and be catapulted across this great land to spend some quality time with Dad 'n sister 'n steps 'n halfs 'n relatives that I'm not sure how I'm related to. Fear not! Updates will continue to arrive apace.

Have you seen Chuck Klosterman's review of Chinese Democracy? It's pretty great:

Reviewing Chinese Democracy is not like reviewing music. It's more like reviewing a unicorn. Should I primarily be blown away that it exists at all? Am I supposed to compare it to conventional horses? To a rhinoceros? Does its pre-existing mythology impact its actual value, or must it be examined inside a cultural vacuum, as if this creature is no more (or less) special than the remainder of the animal kingdom? I've been thinking about this record for 15 years; during that span, I've thought about this record more than I've thought about China, and maybe as much as I've thought about the principles of democracy.

I'm interested in the album as a cultural artifact far more than as music, because I was never a huge G 'n R fan, but I'm looking forward to hearing some of it, in some strange way.

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