Today's Top 5

1. A Voyage Long and Strange, by Tony Horwitz

Horwitz is a great writer. This book began with Horwitz idly wondering what happened in America between Columbus in 1492 and Plymouth in 1620. As it turns out, a lot happened. The Spanish made it as far inland as Arkansas and Tennessee in the South and established the first permanent city in the New World, St. Augustine. Rather than just recounting the history, Horwitz personally follows the explorers' routes, talking up the people who live there now. It's a fascinating book.

2. Giants beat As 1-0 on Saturday.

Sure, the 11-1 asskicking on Sunday was fun, but wow, that game on Saturday was a classic. Timmy Lincecum just pitched his heart out and Brian Wilson - who leads the league in saves - of course made it exciting and put a man on before getting the save. Great game.

3. Long weekend

How great is it that July 4 is a Friday this year? Pretty fucking great, that's how great. I'll be out at the ballyard on Friday watching the G's lose to the Dodgers, in case you're wondering. Then I'll watch some red and blue smudges through the inevitable fog.

4. The Southern Exposure at Alembic.

Delicious.

5. Spain over Germany 1-0 in the Euro final.

Great match. I picked a winner.

Honorable mention: My band's playing Tuesday night. Email me if you want deets.

Drunk Guy on Muni of the Day

The scene: 24th and Mission. Today, around 1:30 p.m. Don't even say anything; we had a power failure at work, so I had a hall pass.


So there's a 67 bus stopped there at the stop. Just as I get there, a cop car pulls up and the 2 cops get out and get on the bus. Then a Muni supervisor-type arrives and gets on too. Obvs. everyone standing around is staring at the bus trying to figure out what's going on.

The cops come out with a little guy who's wasted. I mean, he was fucked up. I love this - he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt. WOO-HOO! LET'S PARTY!!

Anyway, the cops talk to him for a second and I guess they decide that taking him to 850 Bryant would be more trouble than it's worth, and, hey, what the hell, he can stand up under his own power, so fuck it. So they turn around and start talking to Muni Supervisor Guy and it looks like Hawaiian shirt is free to go.

Here's my favorite part. Instead of hightailing it out of there and thanking St. Jude that he's not on the way to jail, HOMEBOY TRIES TO GET BACK ON THE BUS. I'm sure he's like, "Hey, I'm not at my stop yet. Better get back on the fuckin' bus!" So he's standing there and knocking on the closed bus door. Awesome.

The two cops wheel around and grab him again. Now, at this point, the 48 is here and I gotta go. Last thing I saw, the cops were done talking to him and he was tottering off down 24th.

If you're out tonight and see a very drunk short Hispanic guy wearing a Hawaiian shirt, give him a high-five for me. Dude isn't gonna let cops keep him from getting where he's going.

"Ironic" isn't the right word

(06-26) 11:59 PDT SAN LEANDRO -- Two lanes are now open on southbound Interstate 880 in San Leandro in the wake of a crash involving several vehicles that killed two people, the California Highway Patrol said.

All northbound lanes are still closed. Motorists are urged to use different routes, such as Highway 238 and Interstate 580, as crews work to clear the debris.

The crash happened about 9:15 a.m. when the driver of a small pickup truck stopped in a southbound lane of I-880 near Marina Boulevard. A big rig traveling south swerved to avoid the pickup truck and crossed over the median into the northbound lanes, the CHP said.

The big rig then collided with a garbage truck, and both vehicles caught on fire.

The driver of the pickup truck, which had been carrying coffins, was killed, the CHP said. It was not immediately known who the second victim was.

I don't know what the word is - creepy, maybe?

In other news, Fail had himself a completely respectable outing last night in Cleveland. I think we've found the secret - he has to pitch only in American League parks.

Apropos of nothing, here's a picture of Hilary Duff and Barry Zito in the back of a car. Is that Robert Loggia in the front seat looking at them?

In still other news, who left the fire burning? It's smoky as hell around here.

Finally, Spain is my Euro 2008 team. The match against Italy left a little to be desired, but man, they really stuck it to Russia today. Should be a great match with Germany in the finals.

Harry Aleo, 1919-2008

If you've ever been strolling down 24th Street in Noe Valley, you've probably noticed the storefront of Twin Peaks Properties. It's hard to miss.



The window display seems designed specifically to tweak the sensibilities of modern-day residents of Noe Valley and San Francisco in general. The signage refers to the area as "Looney Valley" and contains various items praising Republicans and/or chiding Democrats. It also has a sign saying "It will always be Army Street to me," which will make sense to you if you lived here in SF before the mid-90's and remember when Cesar Chavez St. was Army St.

What you might not know is that Twin Peaks Properties was owned by Harry Aleo, a true San Francisco original who passed away last Saturday at 88 years old.

Aleo was born and raised in Noe Valley. After a short stint with the Brooklyn Dodgers was cut short by injury, he joined the Army and fought in the Battle of the Bulge in World War II. After that, he returned to SF and founded Twin Peaks Properties.

Ever hear of a racehorse called Lost in the Fog? Aleo owned the horse, which won 10 straight races and had career winnings of $978,099. Sadly, Lost in the Fog had to be euthanized after developing cancer.

Early in the thoroughbred's career, Aleo started getting multimillion-dollar offers. "If I sold the horse and took all of this tons of money, I don't have a race horse," Aleo said at the time. "I'm 85 years old and I've been trying to get a good horse for 20 years. If I got all that money, I'd pay half in taxes and then I'd be out looking for another horse."

They don't make many like Harry Aleo any more. Although I never met the man, I love the fact that he seemed to enjoy getting under the skin of the "latte-sipping liberals" who slowly took over his neighborhood. Even though he and I would never see eye-to-eye on politics, I admire his spirit and I'm sad to see him go.

This one's for you, Harry.

They said "drink plenty of fluids" so we did

Man, it's hot out. It was 80 goddam degrees in SF last night at 11:30 pm. 97 was the high yesterday. For those of you who don't live in SF or its environs, you might be wondering "So what? Here in Normal America it's 97 on a cool refreshing day in June." Well, we're used to 56 and foggy in June, so it's quite the event here.

As a public service, let me present TK's Tips on Staying Safe in Extraordinarily Hot Weather:

1. Sit in the backyard and drink Red Stripes and vanilla vodka & Diet Cokes.

Worked for me and Super Hot Irish Girlfriend, anyway.

Inspired by this post over at Whatimseeing.com, I got all ambitious and decided to make frozen Key Lime Martinis. They were pretty good, but were better straight up. For those of you scoring at home, they're vanilla vodka, lime juice, and a little half-and-half.

After a while, that operation grew too complex and SHIG decided she'd rather just go for the vodka & Diet Coke. I had some Red Stripes in the fridge, which, as you know, are great for hot weather.

So we sat out back in the gorgeous night and drank and hung out and listened to music. There aren't many nights in SF when you can sit out until 11:30 in a t-shirt and shorts. It was just about perfect.

Oh, one other thing - yesterday I saw the WORST PANHANDLER EVER by Civic Center BART. Vaguely Italian-ish looking guy, mid-40s. Slicked-back hair, mirrored aviator shades, Tommy Bahama shirt, loafers. Big chunky silver watch. He was holding some Street Sheets. I passed him and he said "Spare change?" and I shit you not, I said "Are you kidding?" and went down the stairs.

Seriously, dude, if you expect to make some money panhandling you'd better make an effort to at least look homeless. WTF?

Viva la revolucion!

Happy Friday, everyone!

Here's my favorite Craigslist post today:

Reward $1000 - 33 (Kearny and Colombus)

Reply to: pers-726410336@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-06-20, 8:17AM PDT


A thin. athletic black man about 5'7" to 5'9" punched a girl in the face in front of Tommaso's restaurant, and assaulted her male friend in front of a large crowd of witnesses.

His white friend, 5'6 to 5'8" thinner still, with light brown to redish hair with some manicured facial hair, wearing a beret, participated in the assault and helped the other man flee the crime scene, before fleeing himself.


These men are wanted by the police.


$1000 and limitless Karma for information leading to his arrest.


Hmmmm...manicured facial hair and wearing a beret?

I gotta say, though, Tommaso's does make an awesome pizza.

What's everyone doing this weekend? I plan on decamping to my overgrown backyard after work and enjoying some kind of tourist-in-Cabo blended fruity drink. It's 85 fucking degrees!

In a completely unrelated story, I'd like to give a shout-out to Morty's Deli, on Golden Gate and Hyde in the Tenderloin. Great sandwiches and salads. During the school year, it's usually mobbed by kids from the nearby Hastings law school, but right now it's ideal. It's little businesses like this that make me think there's hope for the TL. I just stopped by today and had the Little Italy, with salami, coppicola, pepperoni, provolone, and some kind of sweet/hot peppers that were delicious and crunchy.

Just to remind you where you are, though, just after I left, I was approached by a tweaker with about 8 teeth who offered to sell me some "kick-ass CDs" that he had in a small fabric case. I have a feeling they weren't from his personal collection.

I was wrong; it can get worse

Warning: This is going to be a primarily baseball-related post, so if that's not your bag, see you tomorrow.

OK. Super Hot Irish Girlfriend and I went out to the park today for the 12:45 pm day game. Beautiful day, by the way. Sunny, around 70 degrees. Nice.

Now, before the game, I facetiously emailed SHIG my projection for Fail's numbers in today's game. I was just joking around and having a laugh at his expense, so I sent:

5.1 IP, 4 ER, 5 K

Not very good, right? HA HA FUNNY JOKE. Unfortunately, the reality was just so, so much worse:

2 IP, 5 ER, 2 K

It was worse than you can imagine. He looks like crap. Unfortunately, it's our $126 million worth of crap.

Seriously, at this point it's just cruel to keep sending him out there to get shelled over and over again. What's the point? HE CAN'T PITCH EFFECTIVELY AT THE MAJOR LEAGUE LEVEL. Fuck, I'm not even a baseball executive and I can see that.

I know you can't just cut him at this point - which is what would happen in a heartbeat if he was signed for, say, $3 million for a 1-year deal, and I guess you can't send him to the minors, but for the love of all things holy, please please please stop letting him make every fifth start like nothing's wrong. It's not fair to us, or him. At this point, I doubt if he could get through 6 innings on Xbox.

Remember how he supposedly got sent to the bullpen to get his mind straight? And then didn't make a single relief appearance? What the fuck was up with that? Hows about we give that another shot or something?

Fuck.