Friday, November 2, 2012

Which District 1 supervisor candidate's staff can read and understand English? Let's find out!

I live in San Francisco's District 1, a land of Great Opportunity and Promise that contains, besides my house, most of Golden Gate Park, all of Land's End, approximately 4200 Chinese restaurants, San Francisco Brewcraft, and the Balboa Theater.

We're having an election for Supervisor on Tuesday!  The incumbent supervisor is Eric Mar, who is famous for making San Francisco a national laughingstock via his successful initiative to ban McDonald's from putting toys in Happy Meals.  That was stupid, so I'm not voting for him.

If you live in SF (and maybe other places in the World too, I don't know) you know that around campaign time, you get a METRIC SHITLOAD of campaign flyers shoved under your door and attached to your doorknob or whatever you have.  If you're a sane person, these all go straight into the recycling.  They're like getting the Yellow Pages one page at a time.  Useless.

So in an effort to cut down on this bullshit, I put a sign on my gate that said "PLEASE NO FLYERS."  Easy enough, right?  End of the Flyer Problem?

No.  Not end of the Flyer Problem.  Whether out of spite or uncaring, candidates continue to leave me flyers, often attached, as the flyer below, DIRECTLY UNDER THE SIGN THAT SAYS NO FLYERS.

I know, it's hard to see, but the white thing at the top is my sign that says "PLEASE NO FLYERS" and the blue/red thing is a flyer from Supervisor Candidate David Lee.


Phil Ting left one yesterday. I didn't know he was running for anything.  Apparently he's running for Assembly.  I wasn't aware we were voting for Assembly this time.  Now I will be voting for Michael Breyer.  He wants to invest in the future!  I'm for that.  Also, he's the Candidate Who Would Never Leave a Flyer Under a Please No Flyers Sign.  I'm a narrow-issue voter and so far he has satisfied my narrow issue. 

For Supervisor, I am voting for Sherman D'Silva.  So far, Sherman D'Silva has not left any flyers, so that's good.  Also, check out Priority #8! "Require garbage provider to provide lock for all cans (to limit removal of recyclables and prevent garbage from spilling into streets."  Despite his failure to close his parentheses, I'm swooning. Sherman D'Silva wants to crack down on recycling poachers!  Be still my heart.  YOU HAVE FOUR DAYS LEFT NOT TO FUCK THIS UP SHERMAN D'SILVA!

Meanwhile, I'm not the only one with campaign literature problems.  Apparently London Breed doesn't know her district boundaries.   But I do love that name.  London Breed.  The London Breed sounds like a punk band from 1979. Oi!


periqueblend said...

(sorry for the length)
I know you hate the gleaners, but I have some questions about that idea...

Is that locked garbage can thing just for his/your district or Citywide, because we have six cans, and I am the one who does it for my building, and six locks would be a pain in my fucking ass. (And what if you want to put your garbage in there when it's on the street, do you have to find the person who has the key?)

Also who's paying for that? They have to make new cans! And replace locks, and keys - what a boondoggle that would be! And if landlords have a role to play in this then forget it- because those delicate flowers don't do shit for nobody, except cash checks.

Wouldn't a better solution just be to have the cops get a schedule of when pickup is and drive by occasionally? It would take about 20 citations before the problem was almost completely eradicated.

Also he misspelled ensuring and that bugs.

Tamagosan said...

I am shocked that menacing beast behind the gate didn't scare away the flyer-hanger people!

Off to fill out my absentee ballot right now. Clearing out the next 3 hours of my life.

TK said...

periqueblend -


Tamagiosan -

Hahahaha! I didn't even see him there! Hilarious.

Stoney said...

Are you sure you didn't get the anti-London Breed flyer that says "London Breed" huge blue letters and then whatever the negative stuff is in tiny letters. It looks like it could easily be a pro-London Breed flyer. I'm guessing it's Olague who did it. And anyone stupid enough to make that flyer is stupid enough to hang it outside the district in question.

TK said...

Oh, I didn't get any London Breed flyers, the Uptown Almanac people (see the link) did. So I don't know.

generic said...

Met Breyer a few times when he was trying to get appointed to the D5 supervisorial seat. Had to explain some very basic, remedial stuff about local politics. Not sure he reads the paper.

. said...

With the garbage cans, the city will save millions from recyclable poachers. Even if the cans needs to be replaced, the millions of dollars from recyclables will over shadow the cost. Therefore, the city pays to put a locking mechanism on the garbage cans, which can only be click opened with the garbage truck arm lift during disposal. Before residence take their garbage out, all that's need to lock the cans is a simple push of a button which will click the locks shut. Unique keys for garbage can sets will also be given to residence to pop open the locks when needed. Additionally, this will also safeguard from garbage identity theft.

Greg said...

Breyer had dumped so many nasty mailers in my mailbox and at our apartment's doorstep, I think he's actually killed a forest. He's going to lose anyway, but I guess this means at least some of his millions will go to the hard working people in the junk mail business and the US Post office so I guess he really IS "Creating Jobs"