Thursday, May 19, 2011

Get up close and personal with some Germans

This morning I espied this thing on the way to work:

What the? The only Rotel I know is a brand of delicious diced tomatoes with green chiles, and since no one appeared to be handing out queso dip and chips, I had to investigate further.

Guess what? Rotel Tours is actually a bus/hotel thing that people (and by "people," I mean "Germans," apparently) tour around in during the day and sleep in at night. The Rotel website is in German, so unless you know what "eingesetzten Fahrzeugen gleich" means, it won't be much help, but here's a descrip from something called "Gizmag":
The Rotel rolls a coach and hotel into one unit (or for larger groups, a bus and tag-along sleeping quarters). By day passengers sit in the front of the coach and take in all the sights, and by night they adjourn to the rear of the vehicle to enjoy their semi-private sleeping quarters.

You lost me at "semi-private sleeping quarters," but I'm not German, so I don't know about these things. Here's a pic, from Rotel's website:

Look at the happy Germans! They undt der scheeing Nordamerika in der klassiche style. Wait, what is that peeking out from under the covers on the left there? Never mind, I don't want to know. God only knows what Germans do in semi-private sleeping quarters.

You know what? I was thinking, in all fairness, it actually sounds kinda fun, tooling around in the sleeper bus, seeing the country, making new friends and whatnot. Then I came to this part:
Though the lack of showers and bathing facilities may test you if you were expecting five-star luxury, the Rotel does include an extensive drop-down "camp kitchen" and a single toilet. The coaches also stop whenever possible at campgrounds with bathing facilities to ensure the passengers don't become too funky.

You know when passengers become "too funky"? After the first fucking foray outside the goddam bus. You're all good for the first hour of your 6-week trip, and after that, you better become quickly used to German B.O. Pass.


GG said...

Um, you lost me at "single toilet"

thesoniashow said...

Yeah, you lost me at "bus."

periqueblend said...

What's the German word for Hater?

Tamagosan said...

Camping in a bus! Leave it to the Germans. They rival the Japanese in their furious love of travel, but apparently not of hygiene.

Dan said...

I'm guessing East German. People in this part of the world get nostalgic about bus travel in the way that we think about train travel. There are even feel good comedies here about people on really long bus vacations. You have to imagine an alternate universe where there's no Greyhound stigma said...

On my iPhone I (aka me and my 2.75 year old daughter) have a "Wheels on the Bus" app. It sings the song, you get to open windows, swish wipers, etc.

While it's fairly harmless, it does let you switch languages on the soundtrack. The German version is hysterical. Due to syllable giganticism, it just doesn't fit - the singer is desperately trying to catch up through the entire song.

Anyway, that's what I imagine that bus must be like. (Sorry, that's the only German bus story I've got. Though I once was the only non-German on a flight from Munich to Fuerteventura. That was weird but there were bathrooms. And good beer.)