I don't go much to McDonald's any more because I got sick of getting the McFeeling about a half-hour after I ate there. If you ever eat at McD's, you know the feeling I'm talking about.
But after seeing repeated commercials for the new Angus Third Pounder I finally gave in.
The Pitch: "The More the Meatier"...."So thick and juicy, you're gonna need an extra napkin."
The Product: I went with the Bacon and Cheese Angus Value Meal, which came with a medium french fries and a drink. I got a Diet Coke. $7.11 total. As for the bacon and cheese, hey, in for a penny, in for a pound.
I know what you're thinking: After ordering 1/3 lb. of beef with bacon and cheese slathered on it, who the fuck do you think you're kidding with a Diet Coke? I know, I know. The lady behind the counter looked momentarily perplexed too. I just like the taste of Diet Coke better than regular Coke. Speaking of, someone recently told me you can still get Tab somewhere. If you see Tab in the wild anywhere, let me know. I kind of fondly recall its bizarre petrochemical taste.
The result: Not bad, actually.
The bun was nice and soft and tasted fresh. The meat actually tasted like meat, which is unusual for McDonald's. It's not like Quarter Pounder meat (which must be like 75% fat) or the little pucks that are in the flat regular cheeseburgers (which are also full of a magic potion that cures hangovers, but that's another story.) Big slices of red onion. The cheese tasted like the usual McDonald's cheese.
The only weak point was the bacon. It was those super-thin translucent bacon slices that are basically just grease held together with fat and with some kind of bacon flavor added. What would really makes the TPAB a monster would be thick slices of real bacon, but that's probably beyond what McD's is capable of.
The damage: For the burger alone, 790 calories, 39 grams of fat. With the fries, my totals are 1170 cal. and 58 grams of fat. That sounds like a lot. But hey, I can have about 2600 calories a day, so I can still eat dinner! Yay!