Baby Britain feels the best
Floating over a sea of vodka
Separated from the rest
Fights problems with bigger problems
Did Elliott Smith predict Brexit? PROBABLY! There's no way he could have predicted Music Friday, though, because nobody could have predicted Music Friday.
You know how people who are older than the target demo for whatever kind of music is most poplular always say "Bahhhh all those songs sound exactly the same"? Do they say that? They say something like that. I was taking one of my occasional spins through the Top 20 and you know what? THIS TIME THEY'RE RIGHT. In fact, two of the Top 20 songs in the US are almost exactly the same song.
Here's Rihanna's "Work," which has seeped into your consciousness one way or another even if you studiously avoid popular music:
And here's "Work From Home" by Fifth Harmony, a video that makes softcore porn look like The Godfather:
What the fuck. I guess "Repeating the Word Work Between 4 and 28 Times" is the hot new genre.
The rest of the Top 20 is Drake songs and "Panda" by Desiigner or "Desiigner" by Panda, I'm not sure. As far as I can tell, there isn't a song that could reasonably be called "rock music" in the Top 20, or maybe even the Top 50 or Top 100. In fact, the first rock song might be "The Sound of Silence" by Disturbed at #66 which, amazingly enough, is really and truly a cover of the Simon & Garfunkel song. I was all set to write that it "disappointingly is not a cover of the Simon & Garfunkel song" and then I went to watch the video and now I can't stop laughing. Here is a picture of a man singing "Sound of Silence":
That was fun, Disturbed! Do "Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard" next PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!! Then cover "Work Work Work Work Work."
In summation, the Billboard Top 100 is not really for me.
We should all collabo on a Worst Covers of All Time list. I'll get you started:
Sorry! I'm sorry. I had to do that. I want you to hurt like I hurt.
TELL ME WHAT IS THE WORST COVER YOU HAVE EVER HEARD.