Finally, KTVU has turned its all-seeing eye to the MOST IMPORTANT ISSUE OF OUR TIME: Recycling Thieves.
As longtime readers know, I have a borderline unhealthy obsession with Recycling Poachers. Look, I have enough problems already without trying to figure out why, but I think it's (1) the continuous noise of bottles clinking together the night before recycling pickup and (2) the fact that they leave the bins open and then trash blows up and down my street, making it less aesthetically pleasing and thus further away from the Platonic Ideal of a Street that I want and (3) it activates some particular Cell of Krazy in my brain that I don't even understand and that Science hasn't begun to explain, what with all the trips to Mars and cancer and other priorities.
ANYWAY, in my old hood I finally figured out I could deal with this by bringing the bins out in the morning but in my new hood the trucks comes by at like 6 am and that's no longer an option. So I'm basically locked in a mano-a-mano standoff with the guy who steals all the recycling every week on my street. Surprisingly, he appears to live in the neighborhood, because I sometimes see him on the 5 Fulton on non-trash days, suggesting that he's a local whop apparently commutes downtown to do something and just has a Recycling Poaching sideline business.
He pretty much dominates the poaching in my neighborhood. He's out there with his cart starting around 6 and systematically cleans out every bin in like a 4-block radius every Monday night. I would almost admire his industriousness if he wasn't driving me fucking insane.
So in conclusion I'd like to say that I'm crazy.