Wednesday, September 14, 2011

This is a non-exclusive list of TV shows I've never seen a single episode of

1. My So-Called Life

I know it's like an iconic show and all, but I was a guy in his 20's when it was on. I mean, come on, that would be kinda weird if I watched it. It would still be kinda weird. Claire Danes was super hot in Igby Goes Down, though.

2. Bones

Come on. I think I saw 5 or 6 minutes once and I was like "What the fuck?"

3. The Beverly Hillbillies

Even when I was like 6 years old I could tell this was dumber than a box of rocks and not funny at all.

4. Battlestar Galactica

The remake, not the original. I was a kid when the original was on and I think I was pretty into it. It was pretty much straight-up scif-fi. The remake is all Very Serious Allegory, right?

5. Criminal Minds

I don't even know what this is supposed to be about. I was just looking at a list of top rated TV shows and this was on it and I was like "What's that?"

6. Saved by the Bell

I don't think I even knew this show existed until it started seeping into the cultural group consciousness (there's a word for that, right? Something Jungian? I forget) and it was on during a time when I didn't watch much TV and I probably wouldn't have watched it anyway.

7. Dr. Who

This is like some serious sci-fi fanboy shit, right? Never saw it. Don't know the first thing about it. Does it involve time travel in some way?

8. Any show that starts "Real Housewives of"

Just doesn't seem like my thing.

9. Grey's Anatomy

How many medical dramas will there be? Haven't we played out every possible angle? (NB: If you want to see a GREAT hour of medical drama, check out the episode of ER that Quentin Tarantino directed. It's awesome. It's probably streaming on Netflix or some shit.)

10. Two and a Half Men

Kutcher's not sweetening the deal, either.


GG said...

#3: When I was a kid KTLA had reruns every morning of Flipper, Gentle Ben, and then Beverly Hillbillies, and even we knew enough to turn it off when BH came on.

Anonymous said...

That's weird. My comment disappeared after I posted it, so I hope it doesn't appear twice.

Every time I go to my parents' house either Bones or NCIS is on. That's how I know I won't like those shows. Bones, in particular, seems incredibly stupid.

I've also never seen an episode of Saved By The Bell, and people always accuse me of lying about it. I lie about my weight and how many people I've slept with, not what TV shows I watch.

sfmike said...

Gosh, this is fun. Never seen an episode and never want to see one:

1. CSI in any of its geographical manifestations.

2. The Partridge Family

3. House

4. Dawson's Creek

5. Modern Family

6. Brothers and Sisters

7. Happy Days

8. Welcome Back, Kotter

9. The $10,000 Pyramid

There's no moral virtue in this list since a similar list of the crap I have watched, sometimes more than once, is perfectly disgusting and humiliating.

Anonymous said...

I think I'm the only person in the world who has never watched an episode of Law & Order.

GG said...

@burritojustice WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

TK said...

@burritojustice THE FUCK

generic said...

@burritojustice It's like you're not really American.

Anonymous said...

Crazy, I know! Don't mind if it's on, nice sound effects but kind of like background noise to me. Perhaps my disinterest is correlated to several ex girlfriends' utter addiction to the show? Regardless, it has never drawn me in enough to pay attention.

Anonymous said...

I suppose I should clarify that I've never seen a *complete* episode. Maybe 10 minutes.

If it's any consolation, when I was a kid I thought Sanford and Son was freakin' awesome.

sfmike said...

Dear Burrito Justice: I was waiting for my #10, but just didn't know what it was:

10. Law and Order

And yes, I'm unamerican.