Thursday, June 16, 2011

This week's Your Free iTunes Downloads Reviews

Not a good week. Lots of subpar electropop, plus yet another song in Spanish that I don't feel qualified to judge. Let's get started.

Andy Grammer, "Miss Me"

You've heard this song a million times before. It sounds like the background music in a commercial for visiting Nevada or something. It's super-clean and shiny and totally devoid of life. This will show up in a Kate Hudson romcom during the "we broke up and I'm sad and moping around the house" montage towards the end.

Owl City, "Deer in the Headlights"

Ugh, this is terrible. It's like they didn't even put any effort into it. Just string together some synth effects and any melody that pops into your head and call it a day. Are all their songs this bad? No wonder people hate them so much. Fuck this.

Jadakiss, "Hold You Down" (f/ Emmany)

Seriously, I was really liking Jada at the beginning and then WHAM we get hit with the totally predictable R&B chorus. Why you gotta mess up a perfectly good rap song by cutting and pasting a Destiny's Child chorus in the middle of it? Oh well, guess "Emmany" needs to work too.

Ziggy Marley, "Forward to Love"

Really, Ziggy? This is what you're doing? This isn't any good, even by reggae standards. I mean, it seriously sounds like something some white college kids put together after listening to "Legend" for a whole semester.

Junior Boys, "Itchy Fingers"


Here are some sentences you might hear when this is playing in the background:

"The dentist will see you now."

"Your call is very important to us. Please continue to hold and we will be with you shortly."

"Welcome to T.J. McGillicudy's! My name is Cody and I'll be your server today."

"This sure is a good song, Mark Sanchez!"

Justice, "Civilization"

The video, which seems to involve a herd of bison trying to keep from getting crushed by falling statutes, is far more interesting than the song. Poor bison. I thought Justice was supposed to be good? This isn't very good.

Sie7e, "Tengo tu love"

I'm kind of uncomfortable judging songs sung mostly in Spanish because I don't really know enough about the genres to know what I'm talking about. This is some kind of vaguely reggae-ish thing where the guy uses some English words like "love" and "black card" and whatever, I'm not the right person to ask.

THE VERDICT:Even though they're all free, nothing worth downloading this week. Unless you happen to love terrible electropop. Seriously, Owl City must be stopped, for the good of music.


GG said...

I don't care enough about Owl City to hate them, but in answer to your question, yes. I credit their popularity to people's inability to bear imagining a future that doesn't include another Postal Service album.

periqueblend said...

That Owl City song is like a bad Postal Cover band. And I'm convinced that the Latin Hippie in the VW Van was singing the same song as Ziggy Marley.