Thursday, April 12, 2012

Lexicon of the Damned

Those words or phrases that make your skin crawl.

So I had made some kind of large food item, like a pasta thing or something, and I told The Wife that it was cool, we could "just eat on it all week." Her eyes rolled back in her head and she started shaking. "Don't say that," she said. "DON'T EVER SAY THAT." Turns out "eat on it" is one of those things she can't bear to hear. It makes her physically uncomfortable.

Here are some others that The Wife hates:

little boys / little girls room

I agree, anything infantilizing I also generally really dislike. Along those same lines, telling someone (usually a woman) that they "need to put on their big girl panties" is just awful.

Cool beans / coolio

Not the hip hop artist Coolio, but the practice of saying "coolio" for "cool" or "OK." Same with "cool beans." I had a friend who went so far as to say "Kool Moe D" for "cool," but the less said about that the better. He was something of a master at this kind of thing. He had a friend or roommate, I forget, named "Aundra," whom he referred to as "Bed, Bath, and Beyaundra."

I, personally, can't stand:

Popping [his/her/one's] cherry

I'm not sure whether it's the overtly sexual reference or it might just be the word "popping," but I loathe this phrase when used to mean "introducing someone to something for the first time," e.g., "Last night we went to the symphony and I popped Felicia's Mahler cherry."

Flip a bitch

As in "perform a U-turn." I don't know, it just makes my teeth grind together. Maybe because of the faux-bad-boy-ness of it all? Repugnant.

Anything-sauce

Lamesauce. Awesomesause. Killyourselfsauce.

Ping me

No. You are neither a submarine nor a Chinese panda. You are not getting "pinged." If you would like me to call you or email you, simply say that.

12 comments:

GG said...

Agreed on all these, but "ping me" is definitely the worst. I also ate it when east-coasters talk about waiting "on line," like it's 1989 and we're waiting for our AOL dial-up to log in.

Rocco said...

the worst for me is "fleshing (something) out." like, "we really need to flesh out these reports." ew. it combines porn and work, and that's just wrong.

Skance said...

Oh, and how could I forget 'busting out' or any reference to the word busting. I'm strangely fine with things buRSting, but busting kills me. I really detested 'hella' when I first moved here, but now I have a Stockholm-syndrome fondness for it. Oh,and the bros I work with always refer to 'going deep' when drinking. Lamesauce.

Anonymous said...

I hate when people say, "That's in his wheelhouse." Groan.

And, around my office, people will say, "I will task you with that." Task me?! WTF?

Tamagosan said...

I think your Kool Moe D-saying friend sounds highly entertaining.

I realize I say so much of the commented-as-hated phrases a lot at work. Hmm, maybe I hate the person I am at work... And oh goodness, remind me never to ping GG! :-)

I have access to tales of What The Kids Are Saying These Days due to my close relationship with a high school teacher and apparently the last year phrase was you're "doing too much". I'm still unclear on the exact meaning, but it's something like "trying too hard"... The WTKARSTD terminology (oh shit did I just say terminology on a comment, now I do hate the person I am at work when I comment on blogs ahhhh) for certain illicit substances is the best.

TK said...

Oh, do share the WTKASTD terminology for illicit substances, Tamagosan. PLEASE. Is "blunts" out? I'm so old that we used to call them "joints." And what's "blowing clouds" all about?

Tamagosan said...

Apparently The Kids These Days are calling marijuana "dro". I have no idea why, but it's on par with "weed" as acceptable term. Who knew?

Dan said...

"Lion's share."

"Low-hanging fruit."

"Shits and giggles."

Emmybean said...

No worries, That's how i/she/he roll(s), TMI.. all need banning and damning. immediately.

Anonymous said...

I'm very guilty of ping me. Silicon Valley thing? At least it's technically accurate as opposed to the other monstrosities listed above.

Speaking of Ping, best Amazon book review ever.

Tamagosan said...

I guess this is a thing:
http://www.economist.com/blogs/johnson/2012/04/word-aversion

Tamagosan said...

Srsly hating on some words today.
http://www.npr.org/2012/04/26/151470781/slacks-moist-dude-the-worst-words-ever

On this 20th anniversary, I repeat: Can't we just all get along?