Monday, October 26, 2015

The Tech Fuckup Pool: Join today!

The big Airbnb shitshow last week was a hoot!  From the time that one tech company trashed Dolores Park to the time that other tech company painted shit all over the sidewalks (and that's just the ones I remember from the past few months), one thing's for sure; TECH COMPANIES KEEP DOING STUPID SHIT.

Which means it's going to happen again.  Probably soon.

Which means we need to get a pool going.

My initial idea was going to be that you have to pick a tech company AND a type of stupidity, so like if you had "" and "Homeless-related" and paid homeless people $5 to hand out flyers that said "Don't be as dirty as me" then you'd win.  But there are too many ways in the universe to fuck up, so let's keep this simple.  You just pick a tech company you think will fuck up in the next, say, 6 months, put it in the comments, and if you want to you can make a guess about how they do it but that's not required.  So of course it's better if you say LYFT CHRISTMAS PARTY FEATURES ENDANGERED ANIMAL HORS D'OEUVRES but you can just say LYFT and that will do it.

Will there be a prize?  Of course there will be a prize!  I was thinking about making the prize this "Webvan Advertising Floaty Pen Eskesen Denmark Twist and Click Grocery Service" but if you read the fine print it doesn't even write any more!  Just like Webvan itself, it is sadly defunct.  I don't know, I'll think of something.

The deadline for entries is FRIDAY OCTOBER 30, for no particular reason.  Let's go fuck up, tech companies!


papercutsurvivor said...

How many times can we enter the pool? I can't decide between an Uber driver literally murdering a woman or that guy from RadiumOne literally murdering a woman.

TK said...

Hmmm I didn't think about multiple entries. So let's say 2! I will accept your entries for Uber and RadiumOne in the "literal murder" category.

GG said...

1) Somewhere I have a little miniature Webvan truck made out of that squeezeball foam. I wouldn't sell it on eBay though because it is PRICELESS.

2) papercutsurvivor can't use his/her second guess because I'm pretty sure the RadiumOne guy already HAS literally murdered multiple women, they just haven't found the bodies yet.

3) My guess is Zynga and something to do with sexual harassment. If that's too vague, let's say Mark Pincus accused of raping someone at a company event.

Stephen said...

Munchery has been quiet for awhile. Too quiet.

Michael Strickland said...

Zuckerberg does/says something grotesquely tone-deaf about education in East Palo Alto, but he's given away millions of dollars to help those poor, wrong-side-of-the-101-freeway-black-people educate themselves properly, so all is forgiven.

KBN said...

Tesla- Elon, (in a lame attempt to top Larry E in some fashion) will inadvertently pull an Airbnb-esque boner, as is the fashion of the times.

TK said...

GG - Do you know something we don't know? That seems very specific!

S - Solid guess.

Michael - I could see Z saying something dumb but I don't know if it would generate the kind of Mass Outrage we need to see in this exercise.

KBN - Got it. I like it.

Stoney said...

A highranking Salesforce exec literally kicking homeless people while they're down.

periqueblend said...

A screenshotted snapchat from a holiday party is shared on Twitter about some perk/ or going-on at small heretofore unknown startup. Gender is involved. Maybe class and race as well.

Rachel said...

Okay -

One of the food delivery services (Order Ahead, Door Dash, Caviar) refuses service in certain neighborhoods (Bayview/Hunter's Point/Excelsior/Vis Valley) and is accused of discrimination. This accusation will spiral and people will protest and the service/s will eventually be bought and folded in to the Grub Hub/Seamless empire.

And I have to look but I might have a chip clip from some defunct early oughts start up that could be a prize...

hez said...

23andMe willingly hand over DNA to the FBI...ohhh wait.

Lyft passenger thinks driver is kidnapping her and escapes car and breaks ankle in the process. Turns out the driver is just deaf...ohhh wait.

I'm waiting for a Nest fiasco... but sadly they're not bay area.