Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Our new home with the Weather Underground Thermometer

The first rule of blogging is No One Wants to Hear About Your Cats.  No, I'm shitting you, the first rule of blogging is When in Doubt, Talk About the Weather.  People love to hear about weather.

This July sure has been shitty here in our beloved SF!  Local meteorologist Steve Paulson drops a dime on how crappy July was:


Ack, that's terrible, even by July in San Francisco standards.  But hold the phone.  Weather Underground has a better take on it.


What the fuck? Not only does Weather Underground have a balmy FIFTEEN DAYS at 70 or over in July, it even has an equatorial 78 FUCKING DEGREES on Monday the 22nd.

There is only one sensible solution.  We must find the location of Weather Underground's thermometer and ALL MOVE TO THERE.  We'll emerge from the Fog Wall blinking like moles coming out of a hole, looking up at the bright sun.  We'll find the Weather Underground Thermometer sitting at an open-air tiki bar, enjoying a mai tai.  "Come on in, guys!," Weather Underground Thermometer would say.  "This is the real California, not that windswept, fogged-over snowhole you guys live in.  Maybe a dip in the pool later?"  And we'll all get apartments in the Melrose Place building around the Weather Underground Thermometer's pool and we'll only leave when we need to make a run to Costco for more Kim Crawford sauvignon blanc.  If there have been 15 days over 70 at Weather Underground Thermometer's place in July, imagine how nice it's going to be in August!

5 comments:

burritojustice.com said...

The thermometer is obviously in the Outer Sunset. Next to someone's space heater.

Stoney said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Stoney said...

I have to say, the cool felt pretty good two weeks ago when shit was literally melting everywhere else in the country.

Tamagosan said...

We've had a lot of house guests recently who were very skeptical of our warnings of foggy, cool days and advice to pack real clothes. And then thanked us when they got here.

Stoney said...

My late grandmother (an SF native) reflexively said "pack a sweater" any time someone said they were coming here. Almost like saying "bless you" when someone sneezes.