Friday, September 11, 2009

I will finally make the connection between hijacking and dogs

So yeah, I'm pretty much in love with the Mexican plane hijacking story because it is SO FULL OF WIN.

Let's review:

1. Hijacker claims to be on a "divine mission."
2. Said divine mission is to warn the President of Mexico that an earthquake is coming.
3. Because it's 9-9-09.
4. Which is 666 turned upside down.

Could it get any more awesome? WHY YES, IT COULD.

5. The hijacker ordered the pilot to fly to Mexico City.
6. THE PLANE WAS ALREADY GOING TO MEXICO CITY.

This is a hijacker after my own heart. Find the laziest, easiest way to do anything. Want to hijack a plane to Mexico City? Why complicate your life and hijack one that's headed for Ciudad Juarez? No way, man, take it easy on yourself and hijack one that's already headed where you want to go. In fact, with this plan, you don't even have to tell anyone you're hijacking the plane! Just keep it to yourself. You'll know you succeeded. Best of all, when it's over, you don't have to go to jail! Win-win-win all around. MARGARITAS FOR EVERYBODY!

It's the Dog Training Theory of hijacking. Find out something your dog can do and then claim that you trained him to do it. Our dog came with one preloaded feature: when you touch your index finger to the ground and call him, he comes over and rolls over on his back. So all I did was start saying "Roll over!" when I put my finger on the ground and people are all "WHOA AWESOME DOG TRAINING DUDE" and I just smile and nod. Same thing with hijacking. I think. Wait, what was I talking about?

2 comments:

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  2. So if I'm understanding correctly, you can hijack a dog already going to DF if you tap the ground with your finger? I'm so trying that tonight.

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