This July sure has been shitty here in our beloved SF! Local meteorologist Steve Paulson drops a dime on how crappy July was:
July info for San Francisco: 70 degrees or higher was rare. Last occurence was July 4th at 75. Only 4 days of 70 or higher (July 1-4)Ack, that's terrible, even by July in San Francisco standards. But hold the phone. Weather Underground has a better take on it.
— steve paulson (@spweather) July 31, 2013
What the fuck? Not only does Weather Underground have a balmy FIFTEEN DAYS at 70 or over in July, it even has an equatorial 78 FUCKING DEGREES on Monday the 22nd.
There is only one sensible solution. We must find the location of Weather Underground's thermometer and ALL MOVE TO THERE. We'll emerge from the Fog Wall blinking like moles coming out of a hole, looking up at the bright sun. We'll find the Weather Underground Thermometer sitting at an open-air tiki bar, enjoying a mai tai. "Come on in, guys!," Weather Underground Thermometer would say. "This is the real California, not that windswept, fogged-over snowhole you guys live in. Maybe a dip in the pool later?" And we'll all get apartments in the Melrose Place building around the Weather Underground Thermometer's pool and we'll only leave when we need to make a run to Costco for more Kim Crawford sauvignon blanc. If there have been 15 days over 70 at Weather Underground Thermometer's place in July, imagine how nice it's going to be in August!